Funny! 10 Things You Will Never Find in an Average Nigerian Man’s Waste Bin During This Recession
1. Burnt Foods: You can notice this when you want to dispose waste materials to PSP officials. Take a glance at the disposal carriage of their vehicles and you will never see any burnt food disposed by people. It’s either you find biscuit nylons, sweet wraps, broken buckets, etc.
This means that people now stay glued to the kitchens watching over their foods just to avoid a story that touches the heart. Even if the food gets burnt, they will carefully scrap the underneath of the pot and will still eat it.
2. Rice: Gone are those days when people used to throw their leftovers into the waste bins when they can no longer consume it, but recession has brought about changes, whereby, almost every citizen now has a peak milk tin used for measuring rice for a perfect gauge, considering the fact that a bag of rice can now buy plot of land in places like Mowe and Ibafo.
3. Spaghetti Nylon: The price of spag has now increased by 250%, therefore, only the rich can afford to buy it. In fact, the demand for spag has drastically reduced to the extent that many spaghetti companies are now folding up. To be very sincere with you.
Tosyne2much has not eaten spaghetti for the past six months so how do you even find the nylon in my waste bin? Never!!
4. Empty Can Milk: Another thing you will hardly find in Nigerians’ waste bin in this period of recession are empty cans of Peak milk, Three Crown, etc. The prices of these commodities are not smiling on youths at all. What you’re liable to find are empty Cowbell wraps, Jago milk wraps and the likes. This is because people now settle for sachet milk rather than can milk
5. Condom Packs: This sounds very funny but it’s very true. Most guys are now broke that they can’t even boast of one square meal a day let alone three square meal. Guys now channel their little energy on things that will brighten their future rather than $ex.
Now that most states can’t pay salaries, most guys are starving and they won’t even have the energy to bleep a lady for 30 seconds let alone one hour. You will barely spot condom packs in waste bins because “na person wey chop bellyful go fit get the energy to satisfy ladies for bed nah”
6. Egg Shell: The last time I priced a crate of egg, I had to dish insults and rain curses on the seller thinking he wanted to scam me, unknown to me that a crate of egg is now being sold at N1, 100. Many people can no longer eat eggs anymore because of the hike as they now settle for mushrooms and kote fish.
7. Empty Noodles Packs: Empty noodles packs are the common thrashes you would find in almost every waste bin in Lagos but now, spotting empty noodles packs in waste bins has become a thing of the past. On a very serious note, finding a pack of noodles in waste bins in this period of recession is likened to finding a Nigerian politician that doesn’t embezzle public fund.
8. Bournvita/Milo Cans: An average Nigerian student likes to buy beverages every semester but recently, recession has robbed many students of these things and barely would you find them in their rooms nor waste bins.
9. Corn Flakes Packs: Many students will agree with me that most ladies normally use corn flakes packs to decorate their rooms so as to intimidate their fellow students and visitors by positioning it on their trolly for them to see.
But recently, people now use empty corn flakes packs to design their rooms even without anything in it. I once visited a lady last week and when she went outside to get me a chilled soft drink, I spotted a corn flakes on her trolly and wanted to eat some, only for me to find ridiculous things such phone charger, desktop and USB cable in it.
10. Sardines Cans: Before coming up with this article, I actually examined up to 15 waste bins as my case study, and to my surprise, I couldn’t even find an empty sardines can in those bins. I known this is due to the fact that recession has escalated the price of sardines to N250